


I'll Love You Forever, Emma Nolan

by ohheykat



Category: The Prom - Sklar/Beguelin/Martin
Genre: F/F, tw: cancer, tw: needles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:14:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27752149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohheykat/pseuds/ohheykat
Summary: Emma Nolan has never considered herself to be a lucky person. Being kicked out at sixteen, being tricked into a fake prom, losing her girlfriend once, all of it has led to the conclusion that she's one of the most unlucky people on the planet. She had no idea just how unlucky she would get.
Relationships: Alyssa Greene/Emma Nolan
Comments: 5
Kudos: 31





	1. The Fever

It was just a fever. A persistent one, Alyssa would admit, but just a fever nonetheless. It was funny, the way it popped up out of nowhere sometimes, how Emma could be perfectly fine one moment then bedridden the next. At least, Alyssa wanted it to be funny. It was hard to laugh when she was wiping sweat off of Emma’s forehead and having to reassure her that she was okay despite her hysterical tears. Despite all of this, despite Emma’s hysterics, Alyssa knew that this was just a fever.

It was only the first semester of college, Alyssa reasoned, and she had been under so much pressure. Emma was always working so hard, and her girlfriend knew how fevers could pop up out of nowhere when you were stressed. So it was just stress, Alyssa reasoned, and she continued to live her life as if everything was perfectly normal.

“‘Lys!” Emma’s voice breaks Alyssa out of her thoughts, and the young girl walks towards the bed that they shared.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, trying to access what was going on.

Emma tries desperately to sit up but seems almost too weak to do so. Her eyes dart up to Alyssa, who carefully pulls her into a sitting position, moving her pillows in order to support her. Alyssa moves some of the hair sticking to her forehead away from her face, and she gently rests the back of her hand on her forehead. “Baby girl,” the younger girl sighs, before kissing her temple softly. “You’ve got a fever.”

“I’m scared,” tears are already in Emma’s eyes as she reaches out for Alyssa.

“It’s just a fever,” Alyssa reassures her, climbing into bed so that she can hold her girlfriend. “You had a bad week, remember? You’ve had a bunch of stuff going on; I don’t think your body knew how to take it.”

“Every week is a bad week though,” her voice breaks and so does Alyssa’s heart.

“Do you want to go back to the doctor?”

“They don’t listen to me,” Emma whines. “All they do is tell me stuff I already know.”

Alyssa sighs again, knowing that her girlfriend is right. They’d taken Emma three times, and each time they’d been told it was nothing to worry about, to rest, and then were dismissed. However, right now, as Alyssa feels the heat coming off of her girlfriend, she knows that she has to take her back. “What if we go straight to the ER?”

“What?” Emma’s mortified by the thought. “No hospitals.”

“Em,” Alyssa doesn’t want to worry her, truly she doesn’t, but at this point it’s their only option. No one else was listening. “I hate seeing you suffer like this.”

Emma thinks about it for a minute, but instead of answering just puts her head in the crook of Alyssa’s neck. Sighing, Alyssa decides to drop the subject, pulling Emma closer to her and kissing the top of her head. Once she’s sure Emma’s asleep, she carefully untangles herself from the web of limbs that she was trapped in, then lays Emma down so she can continue to rest. After tucking her in, Alyssa makes her way over to the bathroom, where she can call her mother without fear of waking up her girlfriend.

“Hi dear,” Mrs. Greene answers, voice cheery on the other line. “You caught me just in time, I just got home from Betsy’s.”

“You were at Betsy’s?” Alyssa’s surprised, she didn’t realize her mother and Emma’s grandmother had gotten so close.

“Oh yes! She went to the apple orchards over the weekend, but she picked far too many. I promised her my apple pie in exchange for a few.”

“Oh,” Alyssa smiles softly at the thought of her mother’s apple pie, but then snaps herself back into reality. “Mom, did you ever get sick at college? Like a lot?”

“Hmm not really. My roommate was rather sickly though. I swear she was in bed more days than out.”

“So it’s normal?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say normal, dear, but with stress comes sickness. Why? Are you not feeling well?”

“Not me,” Alyssa sighs, shifting her weight on her feet. “It’s Emma. She’s been running these awful fevers, and they just come out of nowhere. We’ve been to the doctor three times already, and they’re telling us it’s nothing but I just… it doesn’t seem like nothing.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean they aren’t just fevers, Mom. She wakes up freezing with cold sweat, and she’s so week she can hardly sit up, and she has like zero appetite. I even made her favorite food last week, and she wouldn’t touch it.”

“Hmm,” Mrs. Greene ponders for a moment. “I’d just keep an eye on it, hon. If it gets too high, I’d bypass the regular doctor and go straight to the ER. I know that’s not what Emma’s going to want to do, but it’s what’s best.”

“Thanks, Mom. I will.”

“And keep me updated alright? I know Emma and I have had our quarrels, but I do care quite a lot about the girl.”

“I will Mom. I love you.”

“I love you too, Superstar. Tell Em I hope she feels better.”

She hangs up the phone without another word, before walking back into the room where her girlfriend is sleeping. Glancing at the clock, she realizes it’s nearly nine, and she’s absolutely exhausted. Alyssa climbs into bed next to Emma, slinging her arm around her stomach to pull her close to her. Kissing the back of her neck softly, she falls into a peaceful sleep.

2 a.m. comes suddenly. Alyssa wakes up with a start as she feels Emma lurch in her sleep. It’s far too hot in the bed, Alyssa notes, and she realizes that she’s also soaking wet with Emma’s sweat. Slowly, she turns Emma to face her, and realizes the girl is just as awake as she is, with her eyes wide in fear as Alyssa places a hand against her scorching hot forehead. “C’mon,” she says quietly and calmly. “Let’s get you a jacket and your shoes. Where are your slides?”

“Under the bed,” Emma’s voice is hoarse from crying, and Alyssa wonders how long she’s been awake.

The curly haired girl gets up from the bed and finds Emma’s jacket and slides. She helps her girlfriend sit up, slowly putting on the fleece over her shoulders and the shoes onto her feet. When she feels Emma getting overwhelmed, she pauses and puts her arms around her, kissing her temple softly and whispering soft nothings into her ear. Once she’s finally dressed, Alyssa helps her out the door and into the car. “ER?” Emma asks, her head throbbing as she leans against the window. 

“Yeah honey,” Alyssa grips her hand, rubbing her thumb gently against her knuckles. “We’re gonna get you better.”

The ride is silent, and as they pull into the parking lot both girls’ hearts begin to race. Alyssa pulls Emma out of the car, then practically carries her to the waiting room. Paper work follows, and an hour passes before they were finally called into a room. When they’re finally settled, Alyssa finds herself stroking Emma’s hair and humming softly until a nurse comes in to take her vitals. “Goodness,” he says as he takes Emma’s temperature. “It’s a good thing you brought her in; it’s nearly 104.”

Alyssa’s stomach drops when she hears that, but as she leaves she remains strong and continues to stroke her hair. “‘Lys, I don’t feel good,” Emma’s voice is almost childlike as she reaches out to hold onto Alyssa’s hand. 

“I know baby, I know,” Alyssa sighs softly, planting a gentle kiss on her forehead. “But we’re gonna get you better.”

When the doctor finally comes in, she’s sure it’s just a nasty case of the flu. That test comes back negative, so then she tests for strep, pneumonia, every virus she could think of. Nothing comes back positive. Then come the blood tests, the dreaded needles that Emma hated more than anything in the entire world. Alyssa held her hand through it all, and, when Dr. Sanders allowed, climbed into the bed to hold Emma against her. Things still continued to come back negative, and the curly haired girl’s heart continued to race out of her chest.

Around 7 a.m. Emma completely breaks down. Everything hurt, everything was too much. She clung to Alyssa’s shirt as tears began to soak it, sobs wracking the blond’s body. “Shh,” Alyssa coos, but really she’s trying to keep herself from crying. They’d been in the hospital all night, and both girls were exhausted. 

“What if- what if-“

“Baby girl,” she cuts her off by kissing her softly, then brushes some of the hair off her head. “Whatever this is, it’s you and me against it. We’re gonna fight together.”

Dr. Sanders walks back into the room around 9. The final test they had performed had taken two hours, mostly because it was one they had to be sure of before they could give results. She doesn’t look happy as she pulls a chair up to the bed, and Alyssa knows from her body language that this isn’t good news. “We’re very sorry,” she explains, shaking her head. “We didn’t want it to be true, but I’m afraid that all of the signs point to it. Emma, you have leukemia.”

And there they are. Those three words would change the course of Emma and Alyssa’s plan forever. Alyssa doesn’t want to believe it as she holds the sobbing Emma, who was already so overwhelmed by everything. She wants to cry. Scratch that, she needs to cry, but she can’t. Because right now, she says to herself, right now my girlfriend is sobbing in my arms and I have no idea how the hell I’m going to make this alright. 

“Lyssa?” Alyssa’s train of thoughts is broken by Emma’s voice. She looks down to see her staring up at her, eyes big and watery. “Can we go home now?”

Alyssa looks expectantly at Dr. Sanders. “The deal is you two can go home for today, rest as much as you can, but Emma has to be back tomorrow at 10. We’ll start with a major dose of chemotherapy in order to hopefully catch this in time.”

Nodding, Alyssa helps her girlfriend out of bed and into the wheelchair a nurse had brought in. They ride home in silence, both of them too afraid to speak. Emma’s fever has returned as she collapses onto her bed, and Alyssa can feel her searing skin as she kisses the top of her head. “I’m sorry, baby,” she whispers softly after a long few minutes of silence. “I don’t know what else to say, Em.”

Emma doesn’t answer, she simply rolls over to look at her girlfriend, tears welling up in her eyes once again. Alyssa sighs, kicking off her shoes and climbing into bed next to her girlfriend. She wraps her arms around her waist, letting Emma lay her head on her chest. She kisses the top of her head, stroking her hair gently as the sun rises over their city. 

“What do we do?” the blonde asks suddenly, pulling away from Alyssa just long enough to look into her eyes.

“I don’t know,” Alyssa responds honestly, kissing her temple. “We fight, I know that much. We do what the doctors tell us, and we get you better. You are going to come out stronger, Emma Ruth Nolan. I can promise you that.”


	2. The Truth Comes Out

The next day comes quicker than Alyssa wants it to. She wakes up to her alarm at eight, but she doesn’t try to rouse Emma until nine. In her hour alone, she simply stares at her girlfriend in her arms, stroking her blonde hair and wondering what the day ahead of them holds. At nine, she wakes up Emma, who throws on sweats and shoes before they head out the door. Alyssa grabs the bag she had packed the night before, and a quarter before ten they arrive at the hospital.

A quick check of vitals and checkup later, Emma finds herself lying in a hospital bed, arm attached to an I.V. bag. Alyssa sits at her side, holding her hand, and rubbing her knuckles softly with her thumb. They tried to explain what was going on, but to Alyssa it all sounded like mush. All she knew was that her girlfriend couldn’t stay awake, she could barely keep anything down, and that she’d be confined to this room for the remainder of the week.

“Hey, Ms. Greene,” Dr. Sanders says as she enters the room, clipboard in hand. “How’re you doing?”  
“How do you think?” Alyssa snaps as she looks at her girlfriend, but then she feels guilty. “I’m sorry. I’m okay, all things considered. Also… could you not call me that? You can just say ‘Alyssa.’”

“Yeah, of course,” Dr. Sanders sits in a chair on the other side of Emma’s bed. “And don’t worry about snapping, it won’t be the last time you do I promise. I know what these things can do to a person.”

Alyssa doesn’t say anything for a minute, just stares at her girlfriend’s pale face. “Does it get any easier?”  
“Not really,” the young doctor admits. “But the good news is we caught it early. Emma has a good chance of beating this and making a full recovery.”

“And what if she doesn’t?”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” she stands suddenly as her pager goes off. “I have to get going, but I’ll be back in a bit to check on her again.”

A few minutes after the young doctor had left the room, Emma’s eyes flutter open, before they suddenly bulge and she reaches for the trashcan sitting by her bed. Alyssa quickly hands it to her, holding it with one hand and her hair with the other. As her girlfriend retches, the curly haired girl whispers soft nothings, trying to get her to calm down. “I hate that,” Emma sets the trashcan down.

“Me too darling, me too,” Alyssa says softly, kissing her temple. “Dr. Sanders is gonna come in here in a little bit to check on you.”

“We need to call Gran,” Emma says suddenly.

“What?”

“I never told her, and I know you told your mom. I don’t want her to hear it from her, no offense.”

“Baby, we can think about that when you get out of the hospital.”

“No, we have to do it now,” Emma’s eyes are pleading as she looks up at Alyssa, and the brunette knows that there’s no way that she can say no. “Please?”

“I’ll call her, okay?”

Emma nods, eyes already beginning to fall heavy as she leans back down on her pillows. Alyssa kisses her forehead, lingering for a minute before she sits back up. Staring at her phone, she debates her options, but ultimately knows what she has to do. She hits the contact with shaky fingers, then takes a deep breath as it rings. For a minute, she think she’ll get lucky and Betsy won’t answer, but she’s proven wrong. “Hello?”

“Hey, Gran,” Alyssa says hesitantly, like she’s trying to pick out her next words.

“Alyssa!” she can hear the older woman’s smile through the phone. “Oh it’s been too long dear, how are you?”  
“I’m good, Gran,” her eyes begin to water as she realizes what she has to tell this woman. “Actually, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

“Oh? What is it?” her voice still sounds cheerful. “Don’t tell me my Emma’s gotten you pregnant!”

Alyssa can’t help but chuckle a little. “No, Gran, it’s not that. It does have to do with Em, though.”

“Oh goodness, are those fevers coming back? She had mentioned something about them last time we talked, but since she hadn’t brought them up again I thought maybe they’d stopped.”

“About that,” Alyssa doesn’t know how to tell her this. Every instinct in her brain wants her to stop this conversation now, to protect Betsy from the harsh reality that she now knows. “Gran, things got really bad. Em woke up in the middle of the night with a really high fever, we had to take her to the hospital and-”

“Oh my word! Is she alright?”  
“Gran,” she can’t help it, the tears spill over and run down her face, she feels like she can’t breathe. “Emma has cancer.”

Silence. The words are out there, but there is nothing to say. Alyssa hears a choking sob, the sound of something falling, and then the small beep as Betsy hangs up on her.

…

Edgewater, Indiana was a small town. When one person knew something, so did everyone else. Betsy had no idea who else knew as she threw on her coat, got into her car, and drove to the Greene’s. Thanking God that Veronica’s car was in the driveway, she quickly got out and rapped her knuckles on the oak door. “Betsy,” Mrs. Greene sighs as soon as she sees her. She knows.

Veronica leads her to the couch, before rushing to the kitchen to pour the tea she had already been brewing. When she hands it to Betsy, the older woman just stares at the cup in her hands. “Cancer?” Betsy says after a minute, the tears in her eyes threatening to spill into her mug. “How can she have cancer?”

“I don’t know,” Mrs. Greene sighs, setting down her own mug to pull the older woman in for a hug. “I wish I had all the answers.”

“It can’t be true,” Betsy doesn’t really accept the hug, but she doesn’t reject it either. She simply sits completely still. “Just two weeks ago, she was home for the weekend. She was running in the backyard with the chickens, chasing them. How does that girl have cancer?”

“I wish I knew,” Veronica repeats, letting her go. “Do you want to go up there?”

“I don’t know,” Betsy admits, and she sounds guilty. “It sounds so selfish, but I don’t know if I can see her like that. I think it might break me.”

“That’s not selfish,” the mother shakes her head. “Take your time with it. Whatever you decide, I’ll help you figure it out.”

“That’s so kind of you,” when she looks back up at the younger woman, she’s crying, and the Niagra Falls of tears isn’t going to stop anytime soon.

So the two women cry. They cry and drink tea and talk about their girls until night falls, and then they promise to do it again the next day. Because really, what else could they do?

…

“Hello?” Angie Dickenson knows three things in life when she answers the phone. She loves New York City, she loves her little lesbian that she practically adopted, and she loves both of those things even more since the latter started going to NYU. Something about her kid being so close to her made things in New York seem even brighter than they already were.

“Hey, Angie,” it’s Emma’s girlfriend on the phone, and she sounds worried. “Are you with anyone right now?”

“Uh, the other three are here. It’s been a long week with shows, so we were all about to go out for drinks together. Why?”

“Well, at least I can get this over with in one call.”

“Get what over with? Did you and Emma break up?”

“What? No. Can you put me on speaker phone?”

“Uh sure,” the blonde is confused, but she puts the younger girl on speaker and tells DeeDee and Barry to stop bickering in the corner. “Alright love, you’re on speaker. What’s going on?”  
“There’s no easy way to say this,” Alyssa’s anxiety is starting to pick up again, but she tries to keep herself from crying again.

“Well spit it out!” DeeDee shouts, voice irritated. “We haven’t got all day, hon.”

“Emma has cancer.”


End file.
